Behind The Stitch RSS



PhinisheD & Tired!

I am PhinisheD! And I am Tired!   On May 13, 2022, with friends and family all around me, I graduated with my PhD in Education from San Diego State University! I partied all weekend, and celebrated this extraordinary occasion with many of my favorite people! And then I was EXTREMELY exhausted. For days. Then I would think that my energy was reset, and I was back to myself, then I was exhausted again. I wasn’t working out, or staying up super late, and was wondering what in the world was making me so exhausted! I had to remind myself, Reka, you just finished the most grueling, arduous, FOUR YEAR LONG project. Your body got you to the finish line, and...

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A Year IN Grief

I played with this title, a year in grief, of grief, with grief? To me, each of those words mean something different, and their inclusion would resonate as different things to me. I finally landed on A Year IN Grief. I am in it. It is all around me, it never takes a day off, and chile…. It’s exhausting.  On one hand, I cannot believe it’s been an entire year since Greg died. On the other, this has been the LONGEST year of my life.  Three things I wish people knew: IT DOESN’T GET EASIER: The hardest part of losing Greg so early in life is that I think constantly about how much more life I have to live without...

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Wrapping Up The Semester | Fall ‘21

This semester was BUSY. I took on way too much!  I mean, yes, we are all hyper-productive, and pretty efficient, which is how many of us made it to, and through graduate education programs, but this semester wore me out. I taught FOUR courses. Yes, four! Two at my university and two at another. The only reason this was possible is because each of them utilized a different modality and frequency, and none of them were a new prep. One was co-taught, one only met once a month, and only one was in-person. But I learned my lesson. NEVER AGAIN.  It was too many courses. Not that the teaching alone was too much. It was teaching in addition to data...

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6-Month Grief Update

6-Month Update My brother’s death changed me. Profoundly. But it did not stop me. I am living and bringing him along for the journey in various ways.    Waves really are the only analogy that fits. I think it's also super fitting since my brother and I both love the water. We don’t have to get in it, but just being around it feels good.    Think of yourself just sitting at the beach, close enough for the water to reach your toes, but that's it. And then a wave comes and literally submerged you. You don't even have time to run. You're engulfed.    The biggest qualm with this grief is you get no warning.  Sure, a special time...

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It's The ABD For Me...

So, I have to defend my proposal. First, what is a proposal? A proposal is one of two parts of the big project (the big D! (dissertation).  In this paper you articulate your “proposal,” to collect data, analyze, as well as how you conceptualize your topic, and why your study needs to be implemented. It’s here that you demonstrate how your research will add to the existing body of literature and field of study.  It is the synthesizing and conceptualizing of what will be my dissertation. The proposal is laborious because you are also synthesizing existing work that has been published on Black girls including articles AND books.  It is proof to my committee that I am ready to take...

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